Traffic Light Sex by Traci Baxendale Ball, LMSW, CAADC, Author and Relationship Coach
*2 minute read
Fact: Conventional Sex Can Be a Bore in Long-Term Relationships
Let’s face it, if you had a cold ham sandwich for lunch every damn day for 30 years, you’d end up pretty sick at the sight of it. The same is true of conventional, very vanilla, sex. But wait, what if things are so stale that you stall before penetration even starts?
Fact: A Traffic Light Has a Predictable Pattern
If your sex choreography follows the traffic light method, (© Vibrant Health Company LLC) you need to learn to change up those moves. Females especially complain about their mates using traffic light sex. Guys and girls have been taught to do what I call the traffic light method of sex. Red is a kiss (he goes in for the kill), yellow is a grope (he begins to pull on parts that are tender and not yet ready to receive his manly hands) and green is penetration. It’s predictable, boring and far too conventional for most people to get into for the long haul.
It is often uncomfortable for the guy to be pulling at the body as an appetizer once the thrill of NRE is over. Often you need a little interest and stimulation before he does that.
Sex may be natural, but in long-term relationships, it is all about being creative. (When a relationship is brand new, the attraction is so strong that it really doesn’t matter what happens – everybody’s happy).
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In my book Mindful Mates, you will find cute and sassy little assignments about sex that you and your partner can work on together. You’ll find answers to burning questions about penis size and low libido. You can order it on the website, which now has scores of published articles about everything related to wellness. Click here: https://vibranthealthcompany.com/product/mindful-mates/
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Traci Baxendale Ball LMSW, CAADC is the founder of Vibrant Health Company LLC
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